Year in Review from Jenni's perspective

This was an Evans family e-mail, but I thought I'd share it here...

"Thank you so much for sending your yearly updates. I love you all so much. Let's see what I can add.

I don't think the Black family lives by months, except I count down the days until the next one so I can have a new budget for grocery money. What can I say, I love food. And I'm building up an array of healthy food storage items, and bulk buying is cheaper. You should see my spice collection! Did you know you can buy organic, fair trade, farmer sustainable, oregano (the main spice in pizza) by the pound? Truly remarkable. And if you can find me a gallon of expeller pressed, virgin coconut oil for cheaper than $59, let me know.

We have lots of fun around here. I think laughing is one of my favorite things to do, next to reading...no, next to creating something...no, maybe next to teaching...Well, who knows? I do have to say one thing that I picked up this year, is being able to give delight to my daughters. I reasoned this past week, that after 6 years of motherhood, I think I am finally feeling the groove and rhythm and living the art of motherhood. It hasn't been an easy journey by any stretch of the imagination, but one of growth and understanding and now of delight.

I am seriously, a committed optimist. I can't help it now, even if I wanted to. And I don't want to :)  I am convinced by the evidence of too many lives and in the laboratory of my own testing that it is the ONLY way to live. I am confident in saying that after living 28 years of being a self-proclaimed "realist" (really a pessimist), that things definitely look better on my side of the fence! Come on over, we'll have a party!! Too bad optimism doesn't leave you immune to trials, wait, actually hard times are more rewarding. Ahh!! Go figure.

Let me start with Anne. Maybe it is because she caused me so much pain during her natural child-birth, that her gift to me is joy. Darling little face, big smile, curly hair, dancing eyes. It has been wonderful to keep her close by as I continue to breast-feed her, though it's only a few times a day. She brings her humor and her surprising comments with her observations about life. She made up her own knock-knock joke a couple months ago and has several variations on it and her "thank-you's" melt my heart. She is the only one of my daughters who consistently thinks screaming is a good way to communicate. She seems to want to potty train herself and calls her poop "mountains." haha! She'll crawl in your lap and say, "Hold me like a baby." She'll also make a mess on purpose and think it's quite funny, and dang it, it is!!! It is literally hard to get mad at her because she's just that full of joy!

Now lets talk about candor. Charlotte is her name. She will never do anything unless she gives her consent to. For example, when she knows she's done something wrong, she will often tell me what her consequence will be and that she is happy about it. Not in a sarcastic way, but in a "willingly submit" way. She is a sober child, meaning, quick to observe. And she seems to know what to say at the right moment. Charlotte's gift to me is peace and laughter!! She is the first one to find something funny and give her infectious laugh. Sometimes, I provoke her to laugh just to hear it! Cuddling her is like a dose of instant peace to the soul. Thankfully, we figured out that much of Charlotte's eczema and allergies were caused by regular old laundry detergent and dairy. After a change in brands and a lay off of wheat, which she became sensitive to for a couple months, she scratches less and winter does not seem to be a super-dry-out problem for her this year. She can have wheat again now, but she will inevitably begin to get red patches and be scratchy all over if she consumes dairy products, which is pretty easy to avoid because we don't have any in the house.

Xela turned 6! Wow! What a sweet little girl! She's as sweet as a cinnamon bun with frosting on top. I am so thankful for her. She has brought me to God. She's helped me to continue to become the person I want to be. I have a personal theory, that is, I used to be so hard on her because of my own childhood insecurities that I hadn't taken the time to deal with that stayed locked up inside. The only option, after trying many different ones, was to work on healing myself, so that I could heal our relationship. And to not see her as a mini-me. Because she is her own person, some similar traits and some very different ones. She is a kind, bright and talented individual who I am looking forward to everyday watching what she wants to do in life. What a ride!! Her current loves are bats and orcas (killer whales). She spends countless time making up stories and draws each picture of action with her favorite writing utensil: a pencil. Her first story ever was about an engineer mouse who saw a bridge collapse on his computer and he rushed to save the day! The funniest one she wrote about was of two deer who found each other and got married, "and he stuck his tongue out and gently licked her." Joe and I had a good laugh with that one.

Joe. Joe is my man! Still a very closed person, but becoming quite hilarious this year, I think he should be inducted to the Evans Weird of Fame. I'm glad I've rubbed off on him. He's rubbed off on me too. I've become a more logical thinker and have had to up the ante when it comes to arguments, and I think it's safe to say, I can argue with the best of them now :) Joe is so stinking logical that most people get frustrated and dodge the point. But it is a gift that he has, to get to the root issue. He loves playing the Wii, especially Wii resort. He loves to be rough and loud with the girls and they love it too. I appreciate his kindness to me in so many ways. His support of me in my chosen career of "raiser of our children" is immense. I thank God for him every day. Marriage is mainly personal work in becoming less selfish, and partly joint work finding common ground, but I couldn't be happier working along side a man who is 8 inches taller than I am! He is in his element in the engineering world, complex equations to figure, bridge projects, testing soils. I'm glad he loves what he does. He is finishing up his novel and I am looking forward to continuing being his editorial consultant. It has brought us lots of laughs and learning with, and about, each other in the process of refining his art. He is writing it because I want him to.  He would be a contented man to sit and stare at a computer green screen playing spider or solitaire for hours on end, but the stories he creates in his mind are irresistible and I love a man who is productive!

Speaking of productive, I love life! There are so many things to learn and try and be and do and create. That has been my favorite word this year-by far!!! Create. And being 30 years old is spectacular!! I couldn't have imagined life soo good at all, yet alone at such a young age as 30! Here's to living! I say to Mom and Dad that I have the best (and worst) of both worlds from them in me. Dad's passion, ideals, love for teaching. Mom's creativity, tender-heart and commitment. Which, makes for a pretty interesting how-do-all-these-puzzle-pieces-fit-into-my-life-in-a-balanced-way? tetris game for myself. I've allowed myself this...

Delighting and homeschooling my girls is top of my list, which delighting happens more often than homeschooling. When the flow is there, all other passions can work wonders in their proper time. I have a successful at-home photo, slide and negative scanning business which gives me those Mr. Keating "carpe diem" moments all I want. Which make me love deeper and hug tighter. I also am an "eating healthy" activist for people who want to hear about it. Best thing about me eating right is that my mind is free. I also dropped a lot of weight in the process, and I thank Mandi for taking me on this continuing journey of a health-filled life. I'm forever in her debt. And last and most creative endeavor is..." (to be continued...)

Love,

Jenni